Clear that mess off the table and have a better competition. Give each child a big box of popsicle sticks, some paper clips and some glue. Watch them use math and science, physics and a large amount of creativity and let them build. The child who creates the tallest Piece of Artwork wins that trophy. How proud he or she would be! A trophy worthy of the center space on the mantle. The adults who participate in these Eating Contests train for them. They eat large amounts of food, stretching their stomachs for competition day. Then, with both fists, they stuff hotdogs, or dill pickles, or wings or giant turkey legs into their mouths until they can't eat any more. They eat so much they get sick, but do make it back to the table to get that trophy. How proud they must be? A result of this Disgusting Practice is yet another negative image of the Ugly American. People around the world who hate us for any number of reasons can add gluttony to our sins. The millions of hungry people will, sooner or later, see this display of arrogance and disrespect for food; that commodity they need so badly. We must stop this. Here's your trophy.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
THE SPORT OF EATING......
Those of you who have been reading my blog know I don't have a soapbox. I don't often feel the need to proclaim or protest. But, I found a soapbox recently and today I will use it. You and I need to change something. We need to stop this. We need to eliminate the great American pasttime of The Eating Contest. These take place all across our country, from street festivals to county fairs and to the mecca of them all, Coney Island Park. We start out early by taking school children and lining them up at a long table, their hands obediently clasped behind them. At the sound of the whistle, they go face down into foil pie tins full of custard and whipped cream. It is not cute. It is not funny. They look like piglets at the trough. The child who can eat the most in the fastest time gets that trophy. And here begins another generation of Fat Americans. Gluttony is rewarded.